Embrace who you are because you are unique and beautiful. No one is perfect! No one will ever be perfect! Yet, there is this exhausting obsession in wanting to be perfect. But, why? From experience I can state that the need to be perfect stems from an inner conflict that I call – a lack of selflove. These things don’t happen overnight though. Something had to happen to us as children for us not to love nor accept ourselves. Perhaps it was that one time when someone told us that we were ugly, too fat or too dumb. Or maybe it was that time when we got rejected by someone and we automatically thought that if only we would change, we would be accepted. We want to be perfect because we think that there is something wrong with us. Since something is wrong with us then no one will want to love us. That is why we don’t love ourselves as well. Then we begin to put ourselves in dangerous situations to achieve that perfect look or that perfect status.
I want to share with you my personal experience with this mindset. I want to be vulnerable because it is the only way I will be able to help someone else who might be going through the same struggles as I encountered. Ever since I was a child I have dealt with various insecurities. I always felt ugly, clumsy and fat. I was a very shy girl and avoided interacting with others out of fear. Everyone thought I was a happy and pretty girl because I always looked my best but no one really knew the nightmare I was living. While many envied me, I was on the floor almost fainted because of how much I had thrown up in the toilet. I had bulimia. I had episodes when I would overstuff myself with food then 5 minutes later, I threw up. I was afraid to eat. Having an eating disorder was only the tip of the iceberg. I had many issues going on internally. I didn’t realize that every time I rejected myself, I hurt myself even more. This was an ongoing vicious cycle for many years. I was suffering so much to the point that I wanted to die because I couldn’t take it anymore.
I began to hate myself and due to this “belief” I self-sabotaged all of those amazing dreams I had. I gave up on everything. But to shorten this up a bit I want to get to my point. It took me several years for me to realize that my obsession was only a thought that was repeated to me by others for a long time. This is when I made my mind up that I would work on changing those negative thoughts to positive ones. When I began to slowly make those changes, I began to witness amazing results. Again, this didn’t happen overnight. It has taken me years. But for the first time in my life, I began to feel peace inside of me. I was able to see myself in the mirror and not be mean towards me. Being kind to myself changed everything.
For those of you who are trying to be perfect I suggest for you to be kind towards yourself. Start slow and be patient. Stop comparing yourself to others. That is not only mean but it’s also a bad habit. You have so much to offer to the world. Being like someone else isn’t going to make the world a better place nor will it make you a better person. Embrace your imperfections. Love who you are. Love every inch of you. If you don’t love yourself no one else will. That’s how everything starts. You can’t expect for others to love you if you are calling yourself stupid on a daily basis. Other people can inspire and motivate you to love yourself. But only you can change your inner world by loving yourself. It starts with a thought then an action. Once you master this you will create a different outcome. It’s never too late to start loving yourself. Being perfect is boring and unreal!!
